Hello! You’ve found us! Whether you’re pregnant and looking for someone to talk to or abortion alternatives, or you know someone who is, you are welcome here. We are here to assist you with all your adoption needs.
This article is the fifth in a series that goes through the whole adoption process for birth mothers (six primary stages in the adoption process). We’ll be going over the fifth step in the adoption process, which is deciding on adoption.
First, though, we’ll introduce you to the adoption process as a whole. Then we’ll spend the rest of the time diving into preparing for delivery: what things you’ll want to have with you, how you can emotionally prepare, and what to expect at the hospital.
Introduction to the adoption process
First things first: let’s introduce you to the adoption process. With A Guardian Angel, you’ll always have someone to talk to throughout this process, so don’t worry about memorizing this process or being overwhelmed. We’re always here to help.
The process goes like this:
- Decide on adoption — choosing an abortion alternative like adoption is the important first step in the adoption process. We are here to give you all the information you need to make an informed decision. Nothing starts until you feel sure about your decision to put your baby up for adoption.
- Choose an agency — look at the services the agencies offer and check to see if you are able to reach them 24/7.
- Make an adoption plan — with A Guardian Angel, you’ll always have someone there to help you choose an adoption plan that you are most comfortable with.
- Choose an adoptive family — choose from families waiting to adopt a child. At A Guardian Angel, we carefully screen our adoptive families so you can be confident your baby will be in a safe and loving environment.
- Prepare for delivery — once you’ve made the preparations for your adoption plan, you can take care of yourself and prepare for delivery.
- Recovering after delivery — you’ll need a little bit of time, at least, to rest and heal after delivery. We’ll still be with you during that time, and we’ll have our lines open for you long afterward.
Remember, this is a brief overview of the adoption process. We have a more in-depth description of the process on our Adoption Process page.
Preparing for delivery
Right now, you’re beginning preparations for going to the hospital and placing your baby with the adoptive family you’ve chosen. We will make sure you have everything you need to be comfortable during your hospital stay and will be their every step of the way. You will never be alone with A Guardian Angel.
What to bring with you
Going to the hospital can be a scary experience for anyone. A little bit of anxiety is normal, and the best way to combat it is by being prepared. We’ve compiled a list of things that will make your stay at the hospital more comfortable and less stressful.
What to pack for labor
- It can be helpful to have a Driver’s License or other picture ID. Also, make sure to bring your insurance or Medicaid card if you have one.
- Though the hospital will provide you with a gown and socks for during and after the delivery, you may want your own. We will make sure you have comfortable pajamas, a comfortable bra, underwear and slippers for your hospital stay.
- Most hospital stays for childbirth are at least overnight. We will help you make sure you have any toiletries you need. Don’t forget your contact lenses or glasses, if you wear them. You will also want something to wear home from the hospital.
- You may want to bring some comfort items like your favorite pillow and blanket or other things that make you feel at home.
- If you have a cell phone, you will want to bring it and your charger. If you’re being induced, it could take a while to start labor, so bring a book or something else to do.
What to pack for after delivery
Some birth moms bring a gift for their baby to send home with the adoptive family. This gift can be anything from a stuffed animal to a letter your child can read when they’re older. Doing this can help you feel like the baby has a piece of you with them.
Emotionally preparing
You are reaching the end of your third trimester, and you’ve had nine months to carry your baby. During these months, you’ve likely experienced a change in your regular emotions. These can be caused by hormones and also by stress.
It’s completely normal to feel a range of emotions during and after you give birth. Some birth mothers report feelings of shock, pain, anger and sadness. When feeling these things, be sure to express your emotions. Talk to someone that can help you work through your feelings. Remember we are always here for you and can even help you arrange for and speak with a counselor months or years after your placement.
What to expect at the hospital
Your doctor has likely already walked you through the steps of what to do when you start having contractions. If they haven’t, call your doctor when your contractions are about five minutes apart. When you’ve reached this point, your doctor will likely tell you to come to the hospital.
Once you get to the hospital, you can go directly to the maternity ward where you will check in. You’ll then be taken to either an exam room or a delivery room, depending on how far along you are in the delivery process.
Once you’re admitted and in your room, you will change into your gown and the nurses will start monitoring you and your baby. If you’ve chosen an epidural as part of your birth plan, an anesthesiologist will come by and after 30–45 minutes, you shouldn’t feel any more pain.
If you don’t want an epidural, you can request IV pain medication, or you can go medication-free.
Our goal is for you to do whatever you are most comfortable with and we will be there to support you every step of the way.
You are also free to choose who you would like to be in the room with you. Many birth mothers want the adoptive family to be included. Others just want their case manager. You get to choose.
Because childbirth takes a different amount of time for every woman, it’s hard to say how long you’ll be in labor. It’s best to plan for a few hours, at least. After you’ve dilated to 10 centimeters, it will be a few pushes (normally anywhere from 3–30), and then your baby will be out in the world.
Typically, your baby will stay with you for a while after you’ve given birth. Doctors will then take the baby to do a brief exam to make sure everything is okay and that the baby is healthy.
Depending on your adoption plan, and what you’ve decided, the baby can either stay with you for awhile in your room or the adoptive parents can take the baby to the nursery and you can visit whenever you would like.
Planning for the day
Making all of these plans can be stressful. We want to make sure you are comfortable and have had a chance to talk through all the details.
If you would like to talk, please call us at (877) 742-6435. We are happy to go over your adoption plan with you and talk about anything you need. We are always there for you.