As a birth mother, you’re making an important decision for both you and your baby. Many things are running through your mind, and one of this biggest worries may be telling your friends and family about your choice.
At A Guardian Angel, we are here to help on every step of your journey. Here are a few tips to consider when having the adoption conversation with your friends and family.
Sometimes, when having sensitive conversations with loved ones, things can get tense. Talking about tough topics can be easier when you can begin with a positive attitude and are feeling calm.
Keep it short.
Be brief and stay on topic. When dealing with big emotions, it’s tempting to bring up past issues or old arguments. But, by keeping the discussion short and staying on track, conflict is less likely to happen. If you feel like the conversation is going down an unwanted path, remember to take a breath and stay focused.
Help others be informed.
One of the main things that can cause problems is misunderstandings. Help your family and friends understand your path by explaining the options you’ve considered. Walking them through your plans may help them understand why you’ve chosen adoption.
Identify how you’re feeling.
It’s important to help people understand where you’re coming from. Being specific with how you feel is a way to help them see things the way you see them and to understand what you are going through. Try using words like “I feel stressed about this situation because…” or “I feel better about my decision when…” Letting them know how you feel and why helps break down any walls that may be up.
Acknowledge their feelings.
Letting your friends and family know how you’re feeling is important, and so is letting them know you understand what they’re feeling. Offering an understanding statement like “I can definitely understand why you’re feeling this way” can really help lessen tension and help them to feel less defensive.
Though these are just a few tips, we hope they will help you feel as confident and calm as possible when discussing your adoption choices.
Do a trial run.
We know that choosing adoption is a big life decision, and discussing your options with family and friends can be difficult. Chances are there is someone in your life who already understands—a close friend or family member that gets it. Ask to do a trial run with them to help you work through the kinks in the things you want to say. And remember, you always have us. You can call us 24/7 if you have questions about telling your loved ones. We have helped many women in your shoes share with their family and friends. We are here for you!
A Guardian Angel is here to support you during your adoption journey. Let us help you through every step.